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Sunday, 12 December 2010

If Symptoms Persist...

So I finally have a solution.

In order to prevent myself from tumbling into the magnetic abyss that is you:


1) I must ensure that I am perpetually five steps behind you so that you're always out of my reach.


2) I must keep my eyes firmly shut so as not to be drawn in by the mystery that lies behind your sad eyes.

This will also ensure that I will not be blinded by your smile or seduced by your masculinity.

If 'object of affections' persists in attempting eye contact, I will avert my gaze or leave the vicinity.



3) It is important that I condition my nostrils to keep out the overwhelming, magnetic, musky odour that you exude.

Note: It is such a scent that can be detected even before 'object of affections' is in close proximity. Therefore, there is an increased danger of relapse due to lack of preparation.


4) Contact with object of affections must remain minimal, if at all.

WARNING: Even the slightest touch will render these preventative steps ineffective.


5) I must condition my ears so that they are less likely to be stimulated by your dulcet tones and your 'gift of the gab'.


CAUTION:
 Instructions must be followed with precision
and continued until symptoms have completely gone.
If symptoms persist, well.... erm...

Guess I should just succumb to it.. right. Right?





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